Kim Shute's Review of Come and See Me in the Good Light

When was the last time you sat down with a loved one and asked them questions about their life? Not just the day-to-day conversational questions, but the ones about the big and small moments? For many of us, we probably haven’t had these conversations. Unfortunately, many of us put these conversations off, thinking that we … Having The Talk of a Lifetime Read More » The post Having The Talk of a Lifetime appeared first on Newport RI | Memorial Funeral Home.

If you have been discussing movies and documentaries with your family and friends, you might have come across the HBO series, The Mortician, a three-part documentary about a funeral business in Pasadena, California back in the 1980s. We figured it was important to talk about it since you might have some questions about the funeral industry after watching it! The series primarily focuses on David Sconce, a funeral director at the Lamb Funeral Home, a family-run business that was established in the 1920s. The show draws on both horror and intrigue from how a family-run institution loved by the community betrayed the trust of hundreds of families. The Mortician lays out how Sconce turned the funeral home into a money-making machine by systematically violating ethical and legal boundaries: mass cremations, body mutilations, stealing materials of value like dental gold, returning misidentified ashes, and engaging in intimidation and even alleged murder. The series is especially chilling because of its access to Sconce himself—this is the first televised interview since his more recent release from prison (there have been many prison stays). His justifications, denials, and evasions reveal an unrepentant mentality that challenges what viewers might expect from someone caught at the center of such horror. This well-researched series is a must-watch if you are into horror and have a strong stomach! What The Mortician does especially well is bring death care into the spotlight and what it means to care for loved ones who have passed. For us at Memorial Funeral Home, it certainly is a reminder that it is understandable that some people might have some distrust in funeral homes! What we can do is assure you that we are held to the highest standard of ethical integrity, both by ourselves, the state and federally. If you do decide to watch this series, know that none of this would ever happen at Memorial Funeral Home! And please feel free to reach out if you have any questions.

Julia co-founded End of Life Rhode Island , an organization with a mission to educate the public about the role of the end-of-life doula.

Life is too short, and it is especially too short for bad books, have I said that before? In this section we try to help you find books, movies, shows, and podcasts worth your time. This month you will need a box of tissues to read Marianne Cronin’s debut novel from 2021, but not for every page. Don’t worry, there are plenty of laughs within her novel too. This is a story of intergenerational friendship as well as life, loss, and resilience.  Lenni Pettersson, a Swedish born 17-year-old is in the terminal ward of the Glasgow Princess Royal Hospital in Scotland. She is a bit of rebel and bored with her time there, she is often looking for ways to fill her days where she never gets out of her pajamas. The ways she relieves herself of boredom include going to the hospital’s chapel to ask questions. Lenni’s knowledge base about Christianity is mixed up between fairy tales and the bible. She is polite, playful, and direct. The priest, Father Arthur, takes a shine to Lenni. One exciting addition to her days is the newly opened art therapy space lovingly called The Rose Room. It is there she meets Margot Macrae, an 83-year-old, who has a bit of spunk. Lenni realizes that between the two of them they have lived 100 years. They decide to make a painting (mostly by Margot, a gifted painter) and story (mostly by Lenni who has a way with words) for every year of each of their lives. In between we get to hear the flashbacks of their individual histories. It is heartwarming and at times, heart wrenching. This book is loaded with storytelling that illustrates love, confusion, life, sadness, joy, and of course death. We hope you will consider this month’s recommendation. Let us know if you like it.

Buckle up people this show is not for the faint of heart, as many TV shows challenge us these days, long gone are the days of Richie Cunningham and Happy Days. Once again, the content for this show is for mature audiences, I mean sex is in the title. Sex and death are not topics that typically go together, at least not out in public. This month we are covering a new show on Hulu and Disney + called Dying for Sex.  The story is loosely based on a true story. Molly, the main character (played by Michelle Williams) is in her 30’s and has terminal metastatic breast cancer. It is not hard to imagine when given such a grave diagnosis that a person might look for ways to escape reality or make the best of the days one has left. Molly does that in an unexpected way; she sets her sights on-- you guessed it-- sex and she dabbles in Fifty Shades of Gray territory. Molly has had an unhappy marriage and one that is sexually unfulfilling. What would you do in her shoes? She decides to leave her husband because he is unable to fulfill her sexual desires. He feels sad when he sees her breasts, as all he can see is her diagnosis and grim prognosis. We then watch Molly try to figure out how to meet her needs both alone and with others throughout the comedy drama miniseries. Molly’s relationship with her best friend, Nikki (played by Jenny Slate) is rich with humanity and humor. So much humor! The chemistry between these two actors is a treat to witness. They show us the messy side of being human and the beauty of how we come together to support one another in times of dire need. I find myself thinking about the subject matter of this show weeks after I have watched an episode. This story gives viewers the opportunity to walk in someone else’s shoes, no matter how uncomfortable. I wonder how people with a terminal cancer diagnosis or someone close to them experience this show? Is it a relief to see part of your journey on a TV show millions of others are watching or is it too soon? If you have thoughts about this, please send us an email at kim@memorialfuneralhome.com.

We are proud to introduce one of the newest members of our Memorial team, funeral apprentice Norma Figueroa! Norma brings with her not only over 17 years of experience in the medical field but also a warm spirit, a deep sense of compassion, and a genuine desire to serve families during some of life’s most tender moments. Norma is originally from Ponce, Puerto Rico and raised in Pawtucket, Rhode Island. Today, she lives in Central Falls. Her interest in the human body started early—when she was in high school and tasked with dissecting a cat during an anatomy class. That moment sparked a lifelong curiosity about anatomy and eventually led her to nursing school. She went on to work as a certified nursing assistant, central supply director, scheduler, receptionist, and lead CNA trainer. Reflecting on her years in health care, Norma says she has always been fascinated by “the amazing things a human body can do.” Her medical background, combined with training and certification in thanatology, gerontology, and funeral service preparation, makes her uniquely prepared for the next chapter of her career in funeral service. Though her background isn’t in funeral homes, Norma has found the transition both meaningful and inspiring. “I’m learning a lot,” she says. “Everyone here is eager to help me learn the ropes.” She has been shadowing at services and learning the administrative ropes that entail with this industry. Norma also knows firsthand how important it is to be sensitive to different family dynamics, a skill she developed through years of patient care. As a bilingual speaker of English and Spanish, she is especially passionate about helping families feel heard, understood, and comforted. “Being Hispanic, we turn everything into a party,” she jokes, “but I know that is not the case for everyone.” She brings that cultural awareness and perspective into her work, meeting families where they are and supporting them in ways that feel authentic to their traditions. Of course, not everyone understands her career choice. “Some of my friends have been weirded out about me working with the dead,” she admits. “And I’m like, ‘Well, you’re gonna need me someday!’” Norma is a proud mom of two college-aged children and she enjoys traveling, going to concerts, spending time outdoors with her kids, and doting on the family cat, Midnight. She also likes to eat tasty food and dance! We are thrilled to have Norma on our team. With her dedication, warmth, and professional experience, she embodies the heart of our mission: to provide care, comfort, and guidance when families need it most.

In the wake of the COVID-19 pandemic, the demand for pediatric mental and behavioral health services has surged to crisis levels nationwide—and Rhode Island is no exception. For adolescents in Newport County, the situation has been especially dire, with no local acute care option for severe mental or behavioral health challenges. Until now, all of the state’s behavioral health beds have been concentrated in the Providence area—at Bradley, Hasbro Children’s, and Butler hospitals—forcing families in Newport County to seek urgent help off Aquidneck Island. Due to the lack of resources on the island, many families have relied on Newport Hospital’s emergency department. In 2022 alone, adolescents in crisis were boarded in the ED for 290 of 365 days, often waiting an average of 14 to 18 days for inpatient placement. These youth are among the most vulnerable, struggling with self-harm, aggression, or suicidal thoughts and behaviors. Recognizing this urgent gap, Newport Hospital is moving forward with plans for a dedicated Adolescent Behavioral Health Unit. The facility will be located on the hospital’s Sheffield 2nd floor and features six rooms and eight beds, including private and semi-private options. The space will undergo a complete interior renovation with substantial infrastructure replacements, advanced safety measures, and a secure outdoor garden for patient use. “It’s been almost a year in planning,” said Erin O’Dollard, Senior Philanthropy Officer at the Newport Hospital Foundation. “We’ve pushed the opening to January 2026 due to staffing challenges,” but, she said, they are well on their way to meeting the deadline in the New Year. O’Dollard explained that treatment for children is different than for adults, and the hospital has been seeing 30 or more kids a day at times, which makes this support so necessary. The unit will offer care ranging from single-day treatment to long-term hospitalization. Upon discharge, ongoing dialogue with families will ensure continued support for individuals and their loved ones. Newport Hospital is also working to secure funding for partial hospitalization programs in partnership with local schools and social workers. The need is undeniable. Nationally, suicide became the second-leading cause of death for youth ages 10 to 24 by 2018. Rhode Island mirrors the trend: one in five children ages 6 to 17 has a diagnosable mental health disorder, and the Rhode Island Youth Behavioral Health Survey found persistent feelings of sadness or hopelessness in high school students rose from 25% in 2009 to 37.8% in 2021. Calls to Kids’ Link RI , the state’s behavioral health crisis hotline, doubled between 2019 and 2021. The project is made possible thanks to community philanthropy. Dr. Jim Nolan and his wife, Peggy, provided the lead gift, inspired by a deep commitment to adolescent mental health. Funeral Director and Owner of Memorial Funeral Home Kurt Edenbach, also contributed to the construction and development of the ward. “It is important to have such a vital resource in our community, especially in the wake of the COVID-19 pandemic,” Edenbach said. “We’re proud to be part of the creation of this resource.” With this new unit, Newport County’s youth will soon have local access to the specialized care they urgently need—offering hope, safety, and healing close to home.

Here at Memorial Funeral Home, we understand that the needs of our families have and will continue to evolve over time, and we try our best to evolve with those needs. One thing that has started to come up in conversations about pre-planning and other funeral arrangements is “What green options do you have?” As awareness of climate change and environmental impact grows, more people are seeking ways to align their values with how they live—and how they leave this world. Traditional burial and cremation methods can have significant ecological footprints, so natural burials and biodegradable urns are just some of the eco-conscious options that are reshaping how we approach death with care not only for loved ones but also for the Earth. We decided to break down some of the more eco-conscious options that we have at Memorial Funeral Home: Green burials In green burials, the body is buried in a way that allows it to decompose naturally without the use of embalming chemicals or other products that can harm the environment. Typically, the body is placed in a biodegradable casket or shroud and buried in a designated green burial cemetery. Currently, there are two cemeteries in Rhode Island that permit green burials. The Ellipse at Swan Point Cemetery and Prudence Memorial Park on Prudence Island also offer burial plots. To make the entire experience more eco-friendly, we offer electric vehicle transport services in a vehicle powered by solar panels on the roof of Memorial Funeral Home. These practices not only reduce pollution and carbon emissions but also help preserve natural habitats by supporting conservation and woodland preserves. Biodegradable urns Cremations can be more eco-friendly in that they are more space-efficient and do not necessarily require the use of formaldehyde to preserve the body, however, they do release carbon dioxide into the atmosphere. To counteract some of the negative effects of cremations, one can choose biodegradable urns that grow into trees, allowing a loved one’s remains to become part of a living legacy. Families can also choose digital memorials instead of traditional gravestones, reducing the demand for quarried stone and physical markers. Green burials, for example, allow the body to return naturally to the earth without embalming or synthetic materials. The body is typically placed in a biodegradable shroud or casket, and interred in a natural setting without a concrete vault. These practices not only reduce pollution and carbon emissions, but they also help preserve natural habitats by supporting conservation cemeteries or woodland preserves. Aquamation, or water cremation (alkaline hydrolysis), is another eco-friendly alternative. It uses water and a gentle alkali solution to break down the body, resulting in significantly lower greenhouse gas emissions compared to flame cremation. The bone fragments that remain are returned to loved ones in the same way that ashes created from flame cremation are returned. Other innovations include biodegradable urns that grow into trees, allowing a loved one’s remains to become part of a living legacy. How does aquamation work exactly? Aquamation, is currently legal in 28 states and will potentially be another option that we can provide in-state soon. The body is put into a stainless-steel chamber where an alkaline solution of water is mixed with potassium hydroxide. The chamber is then sealed, and both heat and pressure are applied. This breaks down the body’s tissues until only the bones remain, which are subsequently broken down and returned to loved ones just as they are in a traditional cremation. The whole process takes between 4 and 16 hours, depending on temperature and pressure. Aquamation uses approximately 90% less energy than conventional flame cremation—a process that emits the amount of carbon equivalent to a 500-mile car ride. Currently, water cremation is not offered in Rhode Island, but we work with another funeral home in Connecticut that offers the service. To make the process as green as possible, we offer EV transportation for this service as well. Choosing an eco-friendly funeral or memorial service is a meaningful way to reflect the values of a person who cared about sustainability in life. These choices help reduce the burden on our planet and offer a gentler, more natural process of returning to the Earth. As we continue to rethink how we care for the environment, it's only natural to consider how our final choices can leave a legacy of respect—for both people and the planet. Eco-friendly end-of-life services are more than a trend; they’re part of a movement toward a more thoughtful and responsible future.

Director of Community Relations Kim Shute shares with us her thoughts on the most recent book that she has read.